Monday, Monday...

Yesterday I was talking with my friends about the future and how a few of us have no idea what is actually in store for us. We kinda think we know what we are supposed to be doing with our lives but nothing is for sure or set in stone. I call it feeling like a leaf dangling in the wind. I hate it. I would like to know everything a stick to the plan but that is not the way it works. Epecially when you want to to things that most people would say are outside the box. I would like to spend my life doing music. Recording, producing, arranging, music director at a church, leading, even a little teaching...I wouldn't mind a side record deal either to help with some income. That is a lot easier said then it is to come by. But the bottom line is "who knows?". Well, God knows but He ain't telling me everything right now! Probably because if I knew I would find some way to screw it up or I wouldn't enjoy he journey and only focus on the goal. I have a hard enough time doing that anyway. O.C.D. much? Anyway, I will keep chugging along and keep trying to open doors where I can and see what becomes of everything. I am happy with the TFW demos and the overall reaction to them. I am going to start recording the F.O.G. ep right away and hope to have that released by next spring. Things are moving. Today we are going to go get our flu shots. Seem like common sense to me. Lots of stuff going on...must be a Monday because I feel like I am staring up at a very large hill I have to climb. That is o.k. though...as long as I make it up! Until next time!

Life can be so confusing...

Do you ever feel like you are a bystander watching your life like a movie? Do you ever get that feeling like a piece of driftwood floating in the ocean? Do you ever feel like you are going foward in reverse? Do you feel like your life may be an oxymoron? I do...sometimes I don't get it. I can feel like a ball of confusion sometimes. I could put together a pretty good soundtrack for my life...it would probably look like this:
1. Ball of Confusion - The Temptations
2. Place in this World - Michael W. Smith
3. Leave Me Alone - Extreme
4. Sailing Away - Styx
5. I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - U2

I guess it would only be an ep...atleast that is all I could think of off the top of my head. Sometimes it is hard. You think you know what you want, then you think maybe you were wrong. You think you should go left, but you should have went right. You zigged when you should have zagged and now you are gun shy to try zagging at this point. All this and I am really tired all the time now. But things could be a lot worse. My cousin's friend just passed away and she was in high school. She died of cancer. How does a high school girl die from cancer. Talk about not even getting a chance to live. That is brutal. I read a couple of their notes her friends posted on facebook last night. I was moved. I can't imagine having to deal with that at such a young age. It is one thing when someone close to you dies but they have atleast lived their life even if it was cut a little short. But something seems so wrong about a high school girl dying from cancer. So what they heck? I don't know. Right now I can't tell up from down and left from right. But I know it will get better. I know this too shall pass. I know I will get my bearings back and my compass will point north again....until then...I just keep swimming, just keep swimming....

Sanctuary...

We want to buy a new house. We are looking outside the city. Somewhere we can breathe a little easier. Some place we can feel a little safer. Some place where hopefully you can leave something outside for more then 2 minutes and it won't be stolen. Some place our kids can play more freely without us feeling they have to be arms reach from us at all times. Some place we can walk our dog and not be looking over our shoulder every five seconds to see who is behind us and why are they there? Some place I can start building VB Music Studios the proper way and actually have room to work on and produce the projects I am working on. Some place with some aspect of solitude and sanctuary where we can create, flourish, find peace, get away from the hectic pace of the city and find the lifestyle we are craving. So we are looking. There a couple places we are interested but we will have to wait and see. I like being in the city but I don't love living in the city. I like working in the city but I wish I had my refuge to retreat back to when I am done. I need my inspirational space where I can create my art and feel secure there. It will come. It will be good. Our friends will want to come visit lots because it will end up be a great place to be. The coffee will be on, the deck set up to hang out, the conversation flowing and the laughter contageous. I can't wait!

Getting there...

The knee is coming along...still pretty sore to bend it but after a few months of rehab it should be good. It will be great to be able to drive a car normally, walk normally, take stairs normally, etc... So life is puttering along nicely. Got lots of work ahead of me with the F.O.G. ep and TFW demos. Today I bought U2 tickets online. I had a hard time with it and still have a hard time with it. The first set of tickets that came up were beside the stage and they wanted $250 per ticket...ARE YOU INSANE? I like U2 but unless Jesus is playing lead guitar for them and it is a one night only show and Bono is going to be giving me a massage after the show I WILL NOT pay $500 for two tickets so my wife and I can take in the show. I had a hard enough time paying the $95 per ticket price. I hate it when it is all about the money. Think of how rich U2 is...do they really need to charge that much to see them play for a couple hours. I can't really wrap my mind around it. Makes me appreciate bands like Pearl Jam more that try and keep their ticket prices down. I saw that Bon Jovi is coming the month after U2 and playing Commonwealth Stadium as well. Their ticket prices range from $36-$136...that is much more reasonable in my opinion. Sure Bon Jovi is less popular now then U2 but in my mind they are fairly comparable for what they have done and hit songs...I guess they aren't as cool or as marketable so they can't charge what U2 does...or is it they just don't want to? I may take my wife and kids and have a good time the 4 of us for less then what we pay for the 2 of us to go to U2. My kids like Bon Jovi better anyway! Ha ha...oh well, I will see you all there at the U2 concert next June and will be shaking my head at those that were willing to spend that much money on those seats. There are so many things I would rather spend $500 on the one concert! You think Bono would be saying "Don't come to our concert...give that money to feed the world!" I guess he wants his lavish bills paid too...he would rather have my use the Bon Jovi money to feed the world instead. Whatever...do what you will. Maybe that is why I love the metal scene...it is still about the music for the most part....BWAAAAAA!!!

Hit Remove Button Now!

So I don't have a lot of patience for religious condescending jerks. I have grown up in the church, I have read the Bible, I have sat in many life changing sermons and services, I have had countless experiences with God...but I try to be as real, honest and unreligious as possible. This might sound weird to someone who says "but you go to church or have a faith belief system so you are religious". Ya kinda... I am talking about the rules and regulations that man has developed to dictate how Christians should act. Don't do this, say this, act like this, have your hair like this, tattoo that, pierce that, listen to that, watch that, etc... Sure there is some wisdom in some of those things but I can truly say with my whole heart that I KNOW that God doesn't give to craps about a lot of that stuff especially when it comes to appearance, style, genre of music, art, etc... Man has made things moral/immoral according to their preference and what they like or dislike...that is wrong. I can't stand it. I also can't stand this attitude that makes people act self righteous, condescending, judgemental and end up being hypocritical. I posted a status on my facebook telling how I hit a Starbucks drive thru to grab a coffee on the way to work and ended up sitting at the window for almost 10 minutes and was happy that the girl just apologized but instead also got a $10 gift card as she felt so bad...I was like COOL! One guy responded by telling me "do you know that 2/3 of the world will only have 1 meal a day". Why would you do that? He doesn't know me personally except we went to bible college together for one year. I never hung out with him. He has know idea about anything about me. Yet he feels he needs to do the Holy Spirit's job and convict me? Guess what dude, you don't have the authority in my life to speak into it! I have amazing pastor's and friends that have that place and know me day in and day out and walk along with me doing life. THEY can speak into my life. The other thing that cracks me up about it is unless you have taken a vow to live among the unfortunate and serve them like Mother Theresa or sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, or give all your wealth to the needy and live a very humble lifestyle (which I would bet my left arm he isn't), don't preach and be self righteous with me. Don't try and do the Holy Spirit's job for him...that is not your place. As The Rock would say "Know your role!" These are the kind of people that a lot of people don't want to go to church. So they probably won't get to have an encounter with God and know Him personally. Our role is to love people and each other not judge, ridicule and act like the Pharisees of the Bible. This is why I love my friends, love my church, love my pastor's, love the C3 Church movement we are a part of and love God. He is just but He is patience and loving. So needless to say I hit the old "Remove From Friends" button from my Facebook. I want people to challenge me by what they are doing not by what they are saying. Everyone is welcome to come to my church (C3 Church Edmonton) and we can do life together...cause that is awesome! Anyway, now I'm done! L8R!

Ahhh...turkey and making Ep's

Hey there. So Thanksgiving has come and gone. I am almost starting to freak out that the statement I just made is true. It is already the middle of October. That is scary. Soon it will be Christmas...also scary. The saying "So much to do, so little time" seems to keep rolling around in my head. Yes, I am thankful for so much including having a bunch of turkey leftovers, but I am feeling the pinch to buckle down and get a few things done that need to get done. This will be easier when I am out of my cast in a couple weeks but none the less still need to begin, plan and execute STARTING NOW! So here is what is on the agenda for the next bit. #1. Must organize and begin preparation for the church Christmas season including songs, arrangements, coordinating with the Kids Zone leaders to make sure everything is done and ready to go come Christmas time! #2. Start tracking the F.O.G. (Fire of God) debut Ep and do all the post production (mixing, mastering, etc...) so it can be released in the early next year hopefully! #3. Continue writing and recording demos for the Torment From Within project so it can begin tracking early next summer and have a late summer/early fall release fully mixed, mastered and all that jazz.
That might not sound like that much but it really is a ton of work which I am more then happy to roll up my sleeves and "Git 'er done!" as Larry the Cable Guy would say. Just means between that, work, family time, church life and all the other things that I invest my time in, I have a very busy many months ahead of me. Scares me and excites me all at the same time. But hey! I want to have a life worth living and this is all part of what I believe is my purpose and journey I am on. It is all good! Until the next time...keep your stick on the ice.

Don't Call Me Peg-leg!

Yes, 6 weeks in a cast from my upper thigh to my ankle...it has been utter bliss (I am sure you hear the sarcasm dripping off that rediculous statement). I am over half way through my misery however and all I can say is "Thank-you God!!" And considering the super annoyance of the situation I think I have done pretty well overall dealing with it. I have gone to Banff to a marriage retreat which required me to do a bit of walking to get lunch and dinner. I have had to drive myself in my "Crapmobile" (little 95 Firefly) to work everyday which is quite a site. I will break it down for you as it is pretty entertaining I am sure. I have to enter through the passenger side door, slide backwards across the seats raise myself up to get my left leg around the gearshift into the drivers area. Then position myself, grab my cane and hook the passenger door, pull it almost closed which quickly pulling in the cane and grabbing the door and closing it tight. My leg tends to be right up against the door (tight fit!) and then I proceed to start the car, and drive left footed. The funny thing is I am really good at driving with my left. Almost as good as with my right. I guess that is why they said "Necessity is the mother of invention". You do what you have to do. So in 2-1/2 weeks I will be hobbling around still with my cane being very careful as I am out of my cast. It will be so nice to gingerly bend my knee. To be able to comfortably roll over on my side while sleeping. To sing on a couch or chair without feeling like I am strectching before a gold medal gymnastics competition. I am hoping the the snow won't REALLY fly before I am out of this cast and I can wear pants and good shoes normally again. Trust me, shorts and sandals in -3c weather is not pleasant! Anyway, I have tough old Swede blood in me and I continue to survive and persevere through it all. I can't wait to see where my knee is a year from now after a long rehab process. I hope I am running, dunking a basketball and jumping around on the stage rocking out...wait...I don't hope...I BELIEVE I will be!! I know God will do that. He is awesome and faithful. Anyway, peace out homies or homie if that is all that reads this. Talk to you again soon.